Moreover, using an elevator, wich is practically in every new apartment, pansioneers can get easily up the 10th floor. Finally, living in this new high rise means living in the city center. All modern apartments are going to be build near the metrolines wich is a good possibility to save time get to job. The krushchyovki gave the owners very warm relationships with neighbors and a lot of common reminiscences. Moreover demolishing the old krushchyovki means that the social mix of neighborhoods will change. The old apartment dwellers believe that they wont be able to renew their ties with friends and to see each other often and as a result of it they will feel forgotten and lonly in this spacious modern apartments.
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What is more that there is not benefit to move because of high fares for living in the high rise apartment. In addition, i suppose there is no benefit for government to do this moving in recent years, when its economical position is not on the high level. In view of all these factors, it appears to me that living in the new high rise has _ student did not make a choice between advantages or disadvantages. Since many of the apartment dwellers, who are usually the older generation in their 70s and essay 80s, essay change is difficult for them. However, there is the possibility that their life will be improving in order to this, i may say, global project. In the final analysis, when the krushchyovki are destroyed, people, of the future generations will live in modern convenient apartment without any old questions of household. Exampln recent years, many old apartment buildings and wooden houses are being demolished in Russia. One advantage is that new high rise apartments are very spacious. They have large kitchens, bathrooms and they are good-planned. Its very convinient for big families consisting of 6 or 7 members.
However, many russian citizens are skeptical about their future because they see many disadvantages. They are emotionally attached to their old with krushchyovki. The kruschyovki gave their owners their first private square meters. And obviously its their memory of their youth that is cherished. Moreover demolishing the old krushckyovki means that the social mix of neighborhoods will change. The old apartment dwellers believe that krushchyovki are a large step in their life and they dont want to change their life-style, to move to the new buildings. Furthermore, one woman Marina said, i am going to die here.
The tenants are being asked to leave their old apartments and move into temporary thesis ones while the new diary apartments are being built. Some russian citizens are upset by this change and others find their new apartments an improvement. There are many advantages to living in new high rise apartment buildings. One advantage is thats more convinent to live in modern buildings. Its up to time and to developing of the whole world. Moreover, the individual, private apartments in new high rise houses will provide many lifes necessities. Finally, living in this new high rise means peoples freedom, independance, from each other. Also new apartments are provide you with safety. From my point of view its reference is unclear the main advantage.
General mark scheme commonly used to evaluate essay band. Outstanding realization of the task set: Sophisticated use of extensive range of vocabulary, collocation and expression, entirely appropriate to the task set Effective use of stylistic devices: register and format wholly appropriate Impressive use of wide range of structures Skilfully organized and coherent Excellent development. Good realisation of the task set: Fluent and natural use of a wide range of vocabulary, collocation and expression, successfully meeting the requirements of task set Good use of a wide range of structures Well organized and coherent Good ambitions development of topic Minor and. Satisfactory realization of task set: Reasonably fluent and natural use of a range of vocabulary and expression, adequate to the task set Evidence of stylistic devices: register and format generally appropriate Adequate range of structures Clearly organized and generally coherent Adequate, though unambitious, coverage. Inadequate attempt at the task set: Limited and/or inaccurate range of vocabulary and expression no evidence of stylistic devices; little or no attempt at register and format Lack of structural range Poorly organized, leading to incoherence Little relevance to topic, and/or too short Numerous errors. Negligible or no attempt at the task set: Totally incomprehensive due to serious errors Totally irrelevant Insufficient language to assess (fewer than 20 of the required number of words) 1st drafts of student essays on the topic: advantages and disadvantages of demolishing the old pyatietazhki. They are being replaced by high rise apartment buildings 17 to 22 stories high.
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Petersburg, peter the Great expanded the government bureaucracy. Actual example 4: Because corporations that spend thousands of dollars for computers want compact and speedy machines. Suggested revision Research and development in computers is engineer rapidly growing because corporations that spend thousands of dollars for computers want compact and speedy machines. Actual example 5: Many who started their own business have said various points of view about being ones own boss. Being a bankrupt the first one. Business man is consider to be a person who always competes with his rivals and if were talking about big money this very fact can be quite dangerous.
Suggested revision Many who started their own business have reported or indicated some of the negative aspects of being ones own boss. The risk of being bankrupted by bad decision is one of them. If a businessman competes with a rival over large profits, his competitor can threaten his life. Actual example 6: The disadvantage of being your own boss is supposed to decide problems by your own and always to take responsibilities. Suggested revision The disadvantage of being your own boss is the overwhelming responsibility that falls on the owners shoulders. Determining which products to buy and deciding what the profit margin should be are major responsibilities that cause the owner many worries.
To correct these sentences, one might say: 1 Although it is difficult to find good workers, a boss should know how to motivate his employees through praise and small bonuses at the end of the year. 2 Although being self-employed may require the signing of some documents, knowing the market for products, knowing ones competitors strengths weaknesses, and finding a good location for a shop comes from prior experience watching the sales of this particular product. Before becoming self-employed, a person should learn about the economy and the market place. 3 Being an owner of a business requires that the boss make important decisions about the workers. If the boss expects the workers to respect him, then he should give clear directions and be fair in making decisions about employees. In these revisions, sometimes it becomes necessary to write longer sentences or two sentences to give a fuller explanation or more detail to clarify the writers intent.
Suggestions actual example 1: Moreover a businessman can have strong rivals and they can become your enemies. They may kill you. Also your business partners can betray you. Suggested revision Moreover, if a businessman has strong rivals and deceitful partners, he can be threatened with death to eliminate his business competition. Actual example 2: The disadvantage means that a lot of people are under your control and you are in charge of them. Suggested revision Another disadvantage of being self-employed means that the owner has to organize and supervise the work assignments of his employees. This responsibility requires careful thought and worrying about his employees may cause the owner many headaches. Actual example 3: When the capital moved from Moscow. Suggested revision When the capital moved from Moscow.
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3 Finally, being self-employed means that the owner has flexibility in planning his time so that he does not have to spend all day in the shop. 4 For protection in business, sometimes it is wise to find a partner and give him a percent of your profit. Over generalization It is common to see sentences which over generalize or over simplify issues. The reader becomes very suspicious of the students reasoning when reading these over generalizations. The writer should be specific in his remarks or use the words many some people to restrict his remarks. One student wrote: It is difficult to find good workers because common employees just do there job and dont try to do all there best. There should be their Another student wrote: to become self-employed, you just need to sign summary some documents and make decisions whether you need to make deals with some organization. A third student wrote: Also it is important that you could command with your employees, if you have them. Its always pleasant to tell other people what.
Because you can invest money in any enterprise you like. Is considered a sentence fragment in English and it is incorrect. A third student wrote: Finally, being self-employed means you can plan your own time. Because you dont have to spend all day at work like common assistant. A fourth student wrote: to give some procent percent of your income, for example. Suggested revision: 1 My brother became ill with several infectious diseases because he autobiography was serving his residency in an overcrowded city hospital. 2 What is more, since the owner is responsible for the businesss income, he can invest this income in more profitable enterprises.
Adverb clauses and sentences that begin with infinitives are sentence fragments. One student wrote: Because he was serving his residency in an overcrowded city hospital. The reader is left in suspense, asking, well, what about it? Another student wrote: What is more, you are responsibility for the money.
Some sentences are too long and need to be broken. One student wrote: One advantage is being independent from another people, business run your own business the way you want, choose what kind of business it will be, make your own rules and conditions, choose employees, partners and organizations to have business relations with. Suggested revision, one advantage of being your own businessman is the independence in making ones own choices. The owner has the ability to choose the type of business, the kind of employees and the rules and working conditions for the business. Students often use an informal and conversational tone that they might use in a letter to a friend. Written assignments given in high school or a university require formal academic writing. One student wrote: What is more, profit, success or failure of Im the boss of me organization depends only on the chief. Suggested revision, what is more, the profit and success or the failure of a individually-owned business depends upon the energy and the wise decisions made by the owner.
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13, after reading the moscow Times article from September 12, 2006, explain what the advantages and disadvantages of destroying the five-story pyatietazhki and replacing them with new high-rise apartment buildings 17 to 22 stories high. Introduction: In recent years, there are many advantages to living in new high rise apartments. moreover, finally, living in this new high rise means however, many russian citizens are skeptical about their future because they see many disadvantages. The kruschyvoki gave the owners moreover demolishing the old kruschyvoki means the old apartment dwellers believe that In addition, in view of all these factors, it appears to me that living in the new high-rise apartment building has choose one: more advantages than disadvantages. There is (are) examples/evidence which show In the final analysis, when the khrushchyovki are destroyed, writing effective sentences: These activities are designed to demonstrate the several ways that short sentences in English can be essay combined or broken into two sentences to express the relationship. When combining sentences or when deciding how to break up a long wordy sentence, the writer should determine what is the main idea or the most important idea and what are ancillary ideas that can be put in subordinate clauses. General rules regarding most commonly observed mistakes: When writing sentences, think of ways to start with a conditional phrase or clause. Think about ways to begin sentences with: when, since, although,.